Just how long before this goes down?
Bits & Pieces
Sunday, March 9, 2008
Trackspin: Theory Of A Dead Man - Any Other Way.
I've been thinking too much lately. Sorry to those who noticed that I haven't been myself, though I'm sure not many have at all. Oh well.
It's a couple more hours before I'm headed back that hellhole around Clementi. Sucks to be me.
Too much going on in my head. Questions, thoughts, I guess I'm just searching for some answers, answers which I probably won't find. I'm telling myself that everything will be fine, that my life's going to be okay, in all aspects. Am I just lying to myself? Could I make things okay? The uncertainties are always there, or rather, moreso now that things are the way they are, I should say. When is too much, just too much for me to take? When will I reach my limit? Told LT Jon that day, "I won't know how much I can take until I push myself beyond my limits and nobody can stop me or help me because it's my limit, and nobody can tell me what that is." I won't know how much is too much until I cross that line, but the problem here is, where is that line? I don't know either.
I wish I could do something to make things better for everyone. Even at my expense. But I guess I'll just have to figure something out, which perhaps I will manage to do so, with time. I've been losing my temper easily and that dosn't bode well, as well as having mood swings again. Guess I'm just too easily affected by some stuff. Nothing's ever good enough for you. Nothing I do will ever be good enough for anybody. It never was, isn't and never will be.
I'm thinking of so much and perhaps, it's time to do something instead of just thinking and not doing anything.
got around to thinking @ 3:40 PM
I've been thinking too much lately. Sorry to those who noticed that I haven't been myself, though I'm sure not many have at all. Oh well.
It's a couple more hours before I'm headed back that hellhole around Clementi. Sucks to be me.
Too much going on in my head. Questions, thoughts, I guess I'm just searching for some answers, answers which I probably won't find. I'm telling myself that everything will be fine, that my life's going to be okay, in all aspects. Am I just lying to myself? Could I make things okay? The uncertainties are always there, or rather, moreso now that things are the way they are, I should say. When is too much, just too much for me to take? When will I reach my limit? Told LT Jon that day, "I won't know how much I can take until I push myself beyond my limits and nobody can stop me or help me because it's my limit, and nobody can tell me what that is." I won't know how much is too much until I cross that line, but the problem here is, where is that line? I don't know either.
I wish I could do something to make things better for everyone. Even at my expense. But I guess I'll just have to figure something out, which perhaps I will manage to do so, with time. I've been losing my temper easily and that dosn't bode well, as well as having mood swings again. Guess I'm just too easily affected by some stuff. Nothing's ever good enough for you. Nothing I do will ever be good enough for anybody. It never was, isn't and never will be.
I'm thinking of so much and perhaps, it's time to do something instead of just thinking and not doing anything.
got around to thinking @ 3:40 PM
Comments:
Post a Comment