Just how long before this goes down?
Bits & Pieces
Monday, August 25, 2008
Trackspin: Joe Satriani - Cryin'.
got around to thinking @ 10:43 PM
Don't know but I think I'm not in the mood for words right now. Just emotions perhaps. And I guess sometimes music just speaks so much more than words could ever do. Expressive licks and harmonically rich blends of instruments..
I think I'm on a very bad slate in my life now. So much questioning and with everything having been forsaken. Was talking to Val just earlier tonight over MSN and I don't know, I said something that made sense to me, amidst all my troubles. "Perhaps sometimes I just have to follow and believe rather than having to know the reason behind things." I guess it suddenly struck me that perhaps for too long, I've been questioning Him about things. Why do things always happen to me? Why do things like this always happen to me and it's usually in similar scenarios and circumstances? What went wrong? What's the rational? And how did I manage to fuck things up so badly yet again..? I guess perhaps it's time I shut the hell up and just try to listen to Him in the silence and trust His plans. Maybe. I don't know if I'm ready to just accept things as they are now. I've always refused to believe I can't play a part in deciding my future myself too, asides from His plans. Maybe I'm just such a fucker that I can't leave things hanging. I know I'm definitely not one to step back and away from anything.
Just one question. Why the hell did he call me and how did he get my number? I believe that he had his reasons for calling and hanging up on me. And I believe that he asked you for my number because he wanted to do just what he did, lying that I called him first to get my number from you. Whatever it is, maybe things will be settled soon. Maybe..
Anyway, I think I'm a nut for retail therapy. Just kind of realized it. I'm currently looking to get a whole lot of gear and such. Next month's paycheck is already decided on my backpack, and presents for Sept babies. I'm looking to get the RSA Emmeline The Tomahawk amp for my poddie next, as well as either Tri-Fis, LiveWires or 5EBs. That alone will set me back close to $1k. And to think I was toying with the idea of getting the Predator instead of the Tomahawk. Sheesh. And once ORD arrives and I get back to playing for ED, head and cab comes up. Decided on what already too, Markbass Little Mark II and a Schroeder 1212L cab or two, depending on their impedance loads. I think I'm seriously like doing retail therapy somewhat. NO FRICKEN SHIT.
Okay, think it's time I head off. Gonna grab some shut-eye soon I guess. The talk today was the same as the past few days, short phrases, short senseless subjects, wanting to sleep, a simple good night. I wish I could stop hurting and feeling how I do.
got around to thinking @ 10:43 PM
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