Just how long before this goes down?
Bits & Pieces
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Trackspin: Stars - The Calendar Girl.
Super nice song from someone again. Think I'm going into slower songs once more.
I don't know. I shouldn't be bothered by it anymore. But I find that I still am. Is it that hard for me to accept things without proper closure? Is it simply because I want to know exactly what the hell happened and why things happened the way they did, how they wound up like that? I really wish I had my answers to my questions. I wish I could answer myself in the mirror when I wake up in the morning.
"Seb, you chose to leave it all behind. So just leave it behind already, just leave it all behind you and walk out that door, perhaps for good."
That's a line I should be telling myself every morning when I wake up.
I chose to be a little proactive this week. Before booking in over the weekend, I decided to finally clean up my inbox on my phone. I've deleted the messages that remind me of the past and all. Everything from a couple of weeks before I enlisted, up until today. It wasn't an easy decision for me to make. But as earlier, I chose to try to dump my past, with everything else if possible. I guess I took the first step that day. I've started a new diary, but sadly, I've left it locked in my locker. Silly of me huh. What good's a diary if I can't write in it due to it being locked away? But yeah, I haven't decided on whether to burn my entire old diary or just rip the pages out and burn just that. Like removing part of a previous life from memory. I wish that were truly possible though. Maybe one day, it will be.
Thinking of getting a Shuffle for me to do my gym work and sports with. Would definitely be a good thing I guess. Just gotta see how finances go, whatwith a new amp and IEMs coming up soon.
I haven't been the best physio patient. I haven't done any of the exercises at all and I still play ball and all despite my back hurting. Also, worryingly, it's been hurting the past 2 days too, quite badly in fact. To try to make changes, I told someone that I'd start doing my exercises from my next physio appointment onwards. Or rather, it was hinted/suggested. But yeah, perhaps it is for my own personal good afterall so I should listen, no? And Matty, this is for you: I'll try to stall your plans on using your benefit card to help get my wheelchair before I'm 30. =p
Alright, I think I need to go make a call or two now. Hari Raya's tomorrow. Hope all you and your Muslim friends enjoy the time with their families.
got around to thinking @ 11:09 PM
Super nice song from someone again. Think I'm going into slower songs once more.
I don't know. I shouldn't be bothered by it anymore. But I find that I still am. Is it that hard for me to accept things without proper closure? Is it simply because I want to know exactly what the hell happened and why things happened the way they did, how they wound up like that? I really wish I had my answers to my questions. I wish I could answer myself in the mirror when I wake up in the morning.
"Seb, you chose to leave it all behind. So just leave it behind already, just leave it all behind you and walk out that door, perhaps for good."
That's a line I should be telling myself every morning when I wake up.
I chose to be a little proactive this week. Before booking in over the weekend, I decided to finally clean up my inbox on my phone. I've deleted the messages that remind me of the past and all. Everything from a couple of weeks before I enlisted, up until today. It wasn't an easy decision for me to make. But as earlier, I chose to try to dump my past, with everything else if possible. I guess I took the first step that day. I've started a new diary, but sadly, I've left it locked in my locker. Silly of me huh. What good's a diary if I can't write in it due to it being locked away? But yeah, I haven't decided on whether to burn my entire old diary or just rip the pages out and burn just that. Like removing part of a previous life from memory. I wish that were truly possible though. Maybe one day, it will be.
Thinking of getting a Shuffle for me to do my gym work and sports with. Would definitely be a good thing I guess. Just gotta see how finances go, whatwith a new amp and IEMs coming up soon.
I haven't been the best physio patient. I haven't done any of the exercises at all and I still play ball and all despite my back hurting. Also, worryingly, it's been hurting the past 2 days too, quite badly in fact. To try to make changes, I told someone that I'd start doing my exercises from my next physio appointment onwards. Or rather, it was hinted/suggested. But yeah, perhaps it is for my own personal good afterall so I should listen, no? And Matty, this is for you: I'll try to stall your plans on using your benefit card to help get my wheelchair before I'm 30. =p
Alright, I think I need to go make a call or two now. Hari Raya's tomorrow. Hope all you and your Muslim friends enjoy the time with their families.
got around to thinking @ 11:09 PM
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